J00sterJournal: Fun in the Sunshine State

Memorial Day! Unfurl the Stars and Stripes, ice the lemonade, slap the hot dogs on the grill, and fire up the Indy 500 in the background. There's no better announcement that summer has arrived than the lazy Memorial Day long weekend. Except of course if it's a miserably cold and rainy in the Big Apple. Time to set sail for warmer climes.

Clearwater Beach, just outside of Tampa, was voted America's #1 beach at some point in the distant past. With a stretch of sand like this, who's arguing? Probably Mei...

Sand doesn't get any whiter than this. No wonder the Republicans held their annual convention here.

Actually, apparently it can get whiter. The more secluded beach of Siesta Key is reputably the whitest of all. Until Rock strips down and exposes the results of a interminable New York winter that is.

Nothing like a hot dog to put the finishing touches on a perfectly honed beach body.

For the price of a week in the Hamptons you could rent a condo for a year down here. Rock reckons you get what you pay for.

A rare sight in Florida, a flag that isn't Confederate.

The best way to fit in at a Floridian beach is to sample every food outlet between here and the water. Oh, and a couple of tattoos would help too.

Memorial Day 2013, tip your hat to those who are scrambling over sand that isn't a beach and dodging projectiles that aren't wayward beach balls on our behalf.

For jaded New Yorkers emerging from the long northeastern hibernation it takes a few minutes to confirm that this isn't snow.

No need to suck it in dude, this is Florida. If you've got it, flaunt it. After all, we did pass the original Hooters on the way here.

How's your swimming? The Hamptons are only 1,200 miles up that way.

Rock lacks the built-in floatation device that most Floridians have around their waist. That's easily fixed, who's up for ribs tonight?

Maybe leaving the island isn't so bad after all. It could be worse, you could be in New Jersey.

A surf shack that serves up fair trade espresso, it doesn't get any cooler than that. Actually it will in a moment, when that dude vacates the premises.

You can't do Florida without a round of golf. Even if the round is on a Rock-friendly course.

Don't worry, Michelle Wei is just as bad, and she's not exactly slumming it.

Ahoy me hearties! You don't happen to have a chest of spare balls in the hold do you?

Mei finally realizes the quickest way to the clubhouse bar is to put the ball in the hole in as few strokes as possible. What a novel concept.

Now that's a double bogey Mei will take every time.

Rock takes the Deutsche Bank Championship by two strokes, after Sergio self-destructs on the back nine with back-to-back sixes. Hate to break it to you mate, but this isn't the IPL.

As the sun starts to set on Clearwater, the party is just getting started. Although some would argue the sun has already set on this bunch of aging rockers.

Apparently Frenchy's is the hottest spot on the beach. Sure, if your idea of a beach is the Jersey Shore.

At least there's no boardwalk here. Although there's enough tattoos on display to suggest that the installation of one would be a welcome addition to the community.

Skinny dip anyone? Actually, in the land of the Big Gulp skinny isn't really in the dictionary in these parts.

Which way to the pier party?

Just follow the psychedelic umbrellas.

Conveniently the historic district of Ybor is just a short drive from the airport, a perfect spot to kill some time before heading back up north.

What the district lacks in vowels it makes up for in quaint Caribbean charm.

Cuban sandwich anyone? Just check the State Department embargo list before you bite in, you may need to renounce your citizenship first.

"Stand clear of the closing doors". Mei feels right at home waiting for the Y line.

Columbia's, a Tampa institution and one of the oldest restaurants in America. Apparently it seats a colossal 1,700 people, although that's probably more like 1,200 these days given Florida's... uhm... expansionary policy.