The contrast couldn't be greater - yesterday we left you dodging the organ collector in the viscous smog of Shenzhen; today we come to you live from the picturesque town of Dali in the Yunnan district. Yesterday toilets came with running water, 8 ply perfumed paper and a copy of the five star room service menu in the reading basket; today they come as literally a trench in the ground, necessitating a degree of manoeuvering that makes Luke Skywalker's trench run look like... well, bulls-eying womp rats in beggar's canyon back home. And that's before the sinking moment when you realise paper isn't provided. Using the force, unfortunately, proves a less than viable option. But enough of the prelude (which is there only to tenously justify the witty but somewhat superfluous title), back to the action!
After touching down (ok, crunching down - this is China Eastern) in Kunming, your adventurers headed straight to the train station to catch the overnight sleeper to Dali. Nestled between misty blue mountains on one side and a big lake on the other, the town has a hint of a Queenstown feel to it - touristy but still with a bit of small town charm. The old city centre is postcard perfect, with cobblestone streets lined on both sides by traditional plaster and tile shops teeming with the colours and aromas of the Far East. Row after row of gaudy silk scarves compete with gleaming cases of silver jewelry and marble figurines for the tourist's wallet . Along each side of the road a creek gurgles through stone guttering. The whole old city is surrounded by a castle wall, interrupter only by four imposing guard houses and gates at each corner of the compass. As the sun sets (at a ludicrously late hour due to Beijing's insistence, in true totalitarian fashion, that all of China use the same time) and the red lanterns twinkle into life, the spectacle is truely memorable.
The other sights of Dali are more of a mixed bag. The explosion in domestic tourism has seen a new level of packaged 'experiences' spring to life. Some are ok, others are certainly experiences, but for all the wrong reasons. Destination one was a working example of an ancient village of the local minority race - known as the White people, based on the literal translation, due to their fairer skin. Rock's pasty arrival immediately rendered that a bit of a misnomer though. Their society was a matriarchy, with women calling the shots and wearing the (elaborately embroidered) trousers. Needless to say, Rock felt right at home. The highlight of the tour, after wading through the tacky obligatory photos in traditional costumes (at least this is the one place where a made in china tag can't be criticised for ruining the authenticity), was a tea tasting ceremony. Think the Chinese equivalent of a beer or wine tasting session, except Rock can actually leave under his own locomotion. The teas ranged from sweet gingery concoctions to bitter almost medicinal brews. Overall, 7 out of 10.
Destination two was a limestone cave that the brochure claimed was the experience of a lifetime. It certainly is - if faced with the prospect of going through it again, jumping off the gondola that takes you up is the preferred option. The 'cave' was little more than a few mundane caverns with very few stalagtites, or any other features that set caves apart from holes in the ground (or that set tourist attractions apart from rip offs). Obviously realising they needed to spice things up a bit, the operators have settled on trying to disguise the shortcomings with an ad hoc assortment of neon lights and christmas lights. Only the spectacular views from the top of the gondola before entering the 'cave' keep this from sinking lower than 3/10.
It was with some aprehension, then, that the party (small p, as opposed to the Party, who are too busy chasing falun gongers to be much interested in doing the touristy thing) set out for destination three - a cruise on the aptly named Ear Shaped Lake. Luckily the fears were unfounded. The two hour cruise on a little 10 person boat took in such sights as a monestary perched on an island (actually I think it was a resort that looked like a monestary, but that's not quite as romantic) and the residence of an uber-rich artist whose waterfront mansion dominated another island. The later was a superb example of contempory Chinese architecture, skillfully blending the natural rock faces of the island with a fusion of glass and concrete. Its hard to tell where the gardens end and the inside of the house actually starts. 8/10.
But now its time to saddle up again for the journey to Lijiang, even deeper in the mountains of Yunnan. Watch this space, or at least watch the papers for news of some dumb westerners meeting an untimely end tring to traverse the Leaping Tiger gorge...
Regards,
Rochester Cahan
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Sent from my BlackBerry Wireless Handheld
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