Peru Part Ocho: Houston, the Condor has landed

I was going to say that day four, the final day, dawns with a palpable sense of anticipation, but actually it doesn't dawn at all. Well, not for a while anyway. Because the campsite closest to Machu Picchu was already booked out, TeamPhatJ00ster camped a further two hours out from the fabled ruin. Which meant a 3am start in pitch darkness in order to still arrive at Macchu Picchu just after dawn. Perhaps a lesser group of mere mortals might have complained about such a turn of events, but TeamPhatJ00ster is made of sterner stuff. Two hours to descend 2,000 near vertical stairs in total darkness using only the pale light of the moon and a dying flashlight? Bring it on!

Remarkably, dawn is the only thing that breaks on the harrowing descent. As the sun rises on a picture perfect day, the pace quickens. Surely it's just over the next hill.

For the record, no it wasn't over the next hill, or the next one, or even the one after that. But finally, after four days, 45km, and eight long-drops, the journey ends.

The first shots of a lost civilization. Ok, they're not the first, but they're the first that Rock managed to get right.

Machu Picchu, lost city of the Incan empire. If you're gonna walk for four days, you better make sure you end up somewhere cool at the end. And you better make sure they serve ice cold coca cola.

I wouldn't get so close to someone who hasn't showered for four days... and only brought two pairs of underwear.

Whew, posing for all these generic tourist snaps is hard work. Come to think of it, so is walking up mountains for four days.

A full moon? Why surely that requires a sacrifice? Luckily history dictates that chicks always seem to draw the short straw.

Luckily for Mei, it looks like the gods aren't hungry today. They must have tried the alpaca steak too.

Victory is sweet. But that coke at the bottom will be sweeter.

One amigo.

Two amigos.
The Three Amigos!

Lots of amigos.


Machu Picchu from perhaps the most famous angle of them all. One of those rare occassions where the real deal looks just like the postcard. Unlike, say, Hawaii, where postcard promises of bronzed topless babes cavorting in tropical waterfalls morph into a bunch of chain-smoking, burger-gobbling land whales from Oklahoma City.

Rock tries to go for the mysterious look by pointing his camera straight at the sun. Next time try to remember to keep the camera between the sun and your retina.

That looks suspiciously like a blue screen. Quick, someone check the post-production suite for a Mr Lucas.

The good news is that each successive terrace sends another 10% of the day trippers scurrying back to the comfort of their air conditioned train. The bad news is that we've climbed quite enough stairs already, thank you very much.

Stand by for a sequence of generic ruins shots. Rock's first rule of photography: when it doubt, snap a ruin.


Things are looking up in the swine flu recovery ward.

Finding an angle with no tourists is harder than finding a restaurant that doesn't serve alpaca steak.

The Temple of the Condor. Where's Indy when you need to spice up your shot with a few decomposing mummies or poison arrows? Oh that's right, he's been sucked into some bizarre alien hive mind with a bunch of glow-in-the-dark ET wannabes.

Guide Victor has just one more trail to point out: which way to the pizza?

Archaeologists like to sit around and debate what Machu Picchu was actually used for. Was it an almost impenetrable fortress, the last bastion of a proud civilization? Was it a temple to the mighty apus of the mountains? Or, if the shot below is anything to go by, perhaps it was a really expensive jungle resort?

Come on, enough photos, civilization and a hot shower beckons. As does the end of this blog.

Breathe a sigh of relief folks, it's the last ruins of Peru 2009.


Not another backpack! Where's my handy porter when I need him?

And that folks really is the end of the road. Now you can cruise on over to http://twophatkiwis.blogspot.com to read all about it again. You know, like an encore.